Finding your co-parent is similar experience to finding your soulmate via a dating site, becoming the parents to your unborn child is the most life changing experience you will ever have and finding the right match for you and your family is priceless.
What are your values, your likes, dislikes? political views and childhood memories? what makes you want to become a parent and why should the co-parent wish to have a child with you. What can you and your selected co-parent offer a child?
There are so many questions to answer and it’s hard to know how to answer them when you are just starting this process.
Single 43 year old Helen from Leeds once said that when she met Brian a gay architect from Bristol, she thought he was the opposite of what she imagined she’d choose for the father of her children. “His fine chestnut hair and fair skin weren’t exactly what I had imagined (I’d always imagined I’d find a strong Italian looking man with dark brown eyes and olive skin like my dad) though his outlook on life, he attitude to religion and his ambitions for his or our potential childs future were what made my mind up, luckily he felt the same way.”
Typically (though not in all instances) co-parenting is where there are two single people who wish to have a child or children and apply to create a life together through a matchmaking process. It can be clinical in it’s approach although many people find it similar to finding a partner and seeing whether you have ‘that’ chemistry, after all, you’ll need a connection if you are to join together and raise a family.
On the legal side of things, those considering a co-parenting agreement may often be concerned about guardianship, parenting rights, access and financial responsibilities. The laws are continuously evolving for donor-conceived children and co-parenting agreements.
Do remember that a co-parenting agreement is not necessarily legally binding although it is considered a good idea as it can help in court if a dispute arises. It is recommended to seek legal advice from a lawyer who specialises in family law when considering your choices in co-parenting.
Co-parenting does not mean having to live under one roof, or even in the same city, the rules are much the same as if you were a divorced couple with children and learning to raise a child under the same concepts, values and beliefs. A mutual connection on the way in which you wish to raise your child/children.
Deciding on whether you wish to become a co-parent is an interesting and enlightening journey, whether it’s a choice driven by life experiences or medical/genetic circumstances that are out of your control. Co-parenting is a fantastic way in enabling many people around the world embark on the greatest adventure they will have have – parenthood.